Lessons Learned: Relax A Little | A 2018 Index


It’s taken me 2 weeks to reflect on 2018. I wasn’t expecting to struggle with creating a coherent “What I’ve learned this year” statement. 2018 seemed to kicked everyones ass. I apologize for my lack of punctuality.

“I ain't taking calls, I be going through s**t.” - Machine Gun Kelly


The most important realization I had about 2018 is that I burnt myself out. No one tells you this is possible when you put on the 1000 hats that you think you need take in your quest for success. When I came back from London in September my restlessness was unmatched. By November I couldn’t turn “work mode” off and relax.

Fashion week is a lot of work. It’s not all glitz and glam. To be honest, the most glamorous moments of my fashion weeks are standing outside of shows and watching the “elite” go into the “tents.” They have the glam. I am a one woman team. I edit, photograph, research, design and write everything that you see on this website. I love it, but this is not glamourous.

“They say my system is overloaded. I'm too much in my head, did you notice? My body's here on Earth, but I'm floating. Disconnected, so sometimes, I feel frozen and alone.” - Ariana Grande


Out of the 365 days in a year, in 2018, I spent 1/2 of the time out of LA. I’m not complaining. I want to travel more this year. While this year’s amazing opportunities and challenges kept me on my toes, I didn’t allow myself to divide working with experiencing life. I made an effort to prove the naysayers wrong and when I felt like I was alone and overwhelmed, I threw myself deeper into my passions. When I did have time to relax, I was still mentally working. That was a mistake that I will not allow myself to make again. Take a break. It’s ok.

“I like proving n*****s wrong, I do what they say I can't.”- Cardi B


Learning to relax needs to be on every 25 year olds “to do” list . You have lived for a 1/4 of a century. Stop letting society tell you that “you should have you life together.” Stop putting the pressure on yourself to be “ok.”

Social media has rewired all of us to be anxiety ridden individuals fighting for our creative spot in the world and that’s just not how life works. It’s a system of checks and balances that are faulty. We are going to meet terrible and beautiful people. We will deal with dreams that will come true and others that will fail. We may not always have money some days and others we might have enough to splurge. There is no deadline to your dreams. There is no rush. You need to learn how to relax and experience the moments given to you.

“I got all the time in the world. So for now, I'm just chillin'.“ - Mac Miller

So here’s to better days and a crazier 2019. I believe in you just as you have believed in me. Happy 2019.

“This a Rollie, not a stopwatch, s**t don't ever stop.” - Drake 


2018 INDEX